The Cynics Corner

Gene Roddenberry's Andromeda

"Be All My Sins Remembered"

by David E. Sluss

18 February 2002

 
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THE BOTTOM LINE
: Is this episode's title supposed to represent irony or self-fulfilling prophecy?

CYNICS CORNER RATING: 3.5 (F)

LAUGH LINE OF THE WEEK: Hunt: "About Bobby Jensen: Hero, not a hero, what was he?" Yes, that's about the extent of Hunt's analytic abilities these days, and possibly the best we can expect from the series as well, as nuance and subtlety are pushed aside in favor of stark contrasts and canned characterization. The bright side, of course, is that the long debate over whether Hunt is a genius or a moron has been pretty much settled. More unclear is why he felt the need to accompany Beka in the first place, especially since it meant leaving the Andromeda in the hands of Tyr. Tyr is probably not the ideal person to be leading the vital mission of mercy to Hazen-Brown, or to be commanding the most powerful ship in the known worlds for any reason. Even if it is now Tyr AlanAlda rather than Tyr Anasazi wearing the chain mail nowadays, it seems overly trusting for Hunt to leave him in command. Presumably the behind-the-scenes reason for Hunt's inviting himself into Beka's story is the need for more "Dylan-centric" episodes, but internal to the events of the series, I can't recall Hunt abandoning a mission to go with one of his wayward crew on a personal trip. On the other hand, he's taken the Maru out often enough that he shouldn't need to have the bunking situation explained to him...

LAUGH SCENE OF THE WEEK: A fairly gratuitous sex scene, justified as a story told by Beka to Hunt and Harper: "It all started when I was in bed having nasty sex with Bobby, and that's when I told him never to lie to me." Give me a break...

SPATIAL ANOMALY OF THE WEEK: Given this level of - uh - detail in Beka's story, we have to assume that the flashbacks are accurate, and that means there is a serious disruption of space-time going on. Here's the sequence in question, with no scene breaks:

  1. The Maru leaves Earth.
  2. Harper gapes at Earth through the cockpit window.
  3. The Maru is fired upon; Harper panics.
  4. Earth is still visible through the window. Beka begins talking about how they can escape to Saturn.
  5. Saturn is visible through the cockpit window before she finishes the sentence.

But wait: At the speed of light it would take over an hour to get from Earth to Saturn, and I didn't see any slipstream events.

QUESTIONABLE COSTUMING OF THE WEEK: You know, if they're going to do cut-rate Borg (again -- see last year's "The Sum of Its Parts"), there must be plenty of costumes available at Star Trek conventions that would have looked better than Bobby's outfit. His robot suit appeared to part of a leftover "Tin Man" costume from a community theatre production of The Wizard of Oz, while poor Costas Mandylor could only hum, "If I only had an agent." I'm not even sure why it was necessary in this script to have Bobby borgified in the first place, unless it was to make absolutely clear to even the most brain-dead members of Tribune Entertainment's target demographic that he's now Evil (probably the reason for Margot's dominatrix get-up as well). The robot body does beg the question: Who exactly built it and used it to repair Bobby? The unsophisticated Mugani?

PANCAKER OF THE WEEK: Tammy Faye Bakker, eat your heart out, and check out the incredibly fake-looking gold makeup all over Laura Bertram's chest. Part of the point of Trance's New Look, supposedly, was that the purple makeup wasn't working. You call this working? Oddly, it didn't look that fake in the last two episodes, nor in the previews for next week's. It may have been a slapdash job, since her appearance was little more than a cameo. After that, Trance Warrior Princess was dispatched to Hazen-Brown, and possibly abandoned there; we never hear of her, or the supposedly urgent mission for that matter, again.

ACTION HOUR ACTION OF THE WEEK: Two major engagements again this week (not counting the Beka/Margot catfight). The first occurs in flashback on Earth, as Beka and Harper are ambushed by Nietzscheans. Fortunately for them, these particular Nietzscheans weren't engineered for marksmanship, and even better, Bobby arrives just in time with a BFG to mow them down bloodlessly. Later, Hunt takes on Borged Bobby with some Kung Fu Fighting. The choreography and wire harness work here were pretty awful, and Hunt "lands" at least one kick that missed by three inches or more. The only thing worse than endless gratuitous action scenes are endless gratuitous action scenes done badly.

RECYCLING OF THE WEEK: Beka gets word about a Person From Her Past, takes off on a personal mission, finds that this Person From Her Past is in fact Evil and intends to do Bad Things and Stuff. Wasn’t this the plot of "The Pearls That Were His Eyes"?

EUNUCH OF THE WEEK: Alarming signs of Tyr's impending visit from the shears were present last week in "Lava and Rockets," but there's no longer much doubt. First we have deadly serious Tyr clowning around and laughing during combat training. Later, we see him totally floundering while in command, asking Andromeda for suggestions on how to deal with the hostage situation. Unbelievable: this is the master schemer and strategist who generally views the "Ship," as he usually calls it, with contempt? Even Harper performed better while in command in "Una Salus Victus." In the end, Tyr, for whom survival is paramount, decides almost casually to "risk our lives for Dylan" ("our" apparently meaning himself and Rommie, who appear to be the only ones on the ship at that point -- does he now view her as alive?). Poor Tyr: "You're so uncompromisingly -- compromised."
  

Previous: "Lava and Rockets"
Next: "Dance of the Mayflies"
NEXT JERRY SPRINGER: Victims of alien possession and the people who love them.

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This review is copyright 2002 David E. Sluss
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