The Cynics Corner

Star Trek: Voyager


by David E. Sluss

21 April 2001

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: A pointless stunt episode without even an interesting stunt.


EUNUCHS OF THE WEEK: If you didn't think the Q concept could be ruined any further, think again. The Q were pretty thoroughly gelded in the awful "The Q and the Grey," but Voyager's writers just had to make sure there were no balls left in the concept, and there clearly weren't. In fairness, Voyager did one good Q episode, "Death Wish," which was one of only a couple of Trek episodes out of a dozen or so that genuinely tried to convey the idea that these superbeings really existed on a different level and were beyond the comprehension of mere mortals. But this? The various Q-pranks pulled by Qunior were even more insipid then usual, particularly the UPN-demographic scene of Qunior making Seven naked and commenting on her perfection -- this from a kid who finds bipeds in general and humans in particular to be disgusting. And these people are "omnipotent," or something, right? So why is it that the kid is a complete moron? And if he is a complete moron, why can't the continuum fix him? Why is the continuum afraid of the Borg, issuing warnings not to "provoke" them? Qunior brags that he had once (while still a Q) opened a "spatial flexure" using only a deflector array. Why would he have needed to use any device to do that, and why would he brag about it, when he belittles "bipeds" for their reliance on "primitive technology?" Ultimately Qunior shows a willingness to suffer an unknown punishment to save Itchy (why didn't I think of that nickname?), and this is supposedly evidence of "exemplary Q-ness." Why is that? Where have we ever seen any indication that self-sacrifice is a trait valued by the Q? What is this crap?

NEW TECHNOLOGY OF THE WEEK: Spatial flexures apparently are a way to travel at transwarp speed. I don't see any indication that Voyager's crew is looking into this, even though it was accomplished using the existing technology of the Flyer, and was presumably logged by its computer. On the threshold of finding newt technology, Janeway once again slithers away...

WELFARE RECIPIENT OF THE WEEK: John deLancie as Q, looking far too old and tired to be playing this role. And look, he gets child care credits from Star Trek's Welfare Program too...

NAME-DROPPING OF THE WEEK: The Picard reference was inevitable, but we got Kirk as a bonus!

STARFLEET UNINTELLIGENCE OF THE WEEK: I've resisted doing this to Tuvok, a good character who is too often shelved or misused, but I officially declare him a Stooge -- Curly Joe -- for suggesting that a Security raid on engineering would be an effective way to end Qunior's party. Where's the logic in that, you imbecile? This ain't exactly Elian...

MEDICAL QUACK OF THE WEEK: Refreshing as it was to see Neelix silenced, I question the Doctor's inability to replace his vocal cords. With all the Miracle Medicine we've seen on Star Trek (ocular implants, pills that regenerate organs, holographic lungs, etc.), this seems like it would be a relatively minor procedure. Unless he just didn't want to give Neelix his speech back; why would he?

VOYAGER CLICHE OF THE WEEK: A Shuttle Theft, this time by a couple of kids. It's a shame Qunior didn't know that any slob can open Voyager's shuttlebay doors; he didn't need to shoot his way out.

Previous: "Human Error"
Next: "Author, Author"
NEXT WEEK: Voyager's writers writing about writing; the week after next: Jeffrey Dahmer's cookbook...



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This review is copyright 2001 David E. Sluss
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